Episode 82: Barry Shore – Finding and Choosing Joy in Sales
Featured guest Barry Shore, also known as the Ambassador of Joy, takes listeners on a remarkable and truly inspirational ride through the process of finding and choosing to live in joy, no matter the circumstance.
Join Barry and the team at Social Sales Link as they navigate through a plethora of life-changing advice on sales and life in general, such as learning about the transformational value of sales, focusing on listening, and learning the ability to leverage silence for your benefit.
Barry Shore 00:00
Sales are no different today, social sales are no different today than they were 50 years ago, 200 years ago, 500 years old, 5000 years ago, which means you need to be personable in your presentation of yourself and in your speech. You need to be able to be understood by what you say and how you appear because people work with people, that’s making sales social.
Bob Woods 00:32
Welcome to the Making Sales Social Podcast! Featuring the top voices in sales and marketing. Join hosts Brynne Tillman and Bill McCormick as they discuss the best tips and strategies they are teaching their clients so you can leverage them for your own virtual and social selling. You can also listen to us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Google Play. Here are your hosts Brynne Tillman and Bill McCormick.
Bill McCormick 01:09
Hi, welcome to Making Sales Social! I’m Bill McCormick.
Brynne Tillman 01:16
I’m Brynne Tillman.
Bill McCormick 01:13
So Brynne, tell everyone who our guest is today.
Brynne Tillman 01:16
I’m excited. This is a new friend of mine. We met through a group called JVMM where there’s people that want to do joint ventures with other people in the business. And Barry and I got on a call and really hit it off and some of the things that he was sharing with me were so magic, I thought we really have to share this with our audience. So Barry Shore, welcome to the show. Tell everyone a little bit about you.
Barry Shore 01:39
Good day, beautiful, bountiful, beloved immortal beings and good-looking people. Now wonderful Bill and Brynne, how can I make the categorical statement, all the thousands and tens of thousands of people that are listening and watching, all good looking, because by definition, if they tuned in to listening to you, and to me, they’re always looking for and finding the good. That’s a good-looking person — looking for and finding the good and we’re gonna talk about that in-depth and how it’s going to enable you to become happier, healthier, and wealthier.
Bill McCormick 02:13
Wow! (Brynne: I love that.)
Bill McCormick 02:15
I’m gonna remember, yeah, good… good looking. So, alright, Barry, you’ve got me tongue-tied already and we’re just starting. So tell everyone, we ask everyone the same first question, what is making sales social mean to you?
Barry Shore 02:28
The best news is for those watching, I am older than 25 years, as matter of fact, almost by half a century. Sales are no different today, social sales are no different today than they were 50 years ago, 200 years ago, 500 years ago, 5,000 years ago, which means you need to be personable in your presentation of yourself and in your speech. You need to be able to be understood by what you say, and how you appear because people work with people, that’s making sales social.
Brynne Tillman 03:08
Bill McCormick 03:10
Yeah. You know, “All business is personal,” right? So let’s unpack that a little bit. So we’re talking about using social and we talk a lot about using LinkedIn. How do I be more social, personable, likable on my LinkedIn profile?
Barry Shore 03:29
In the simplest way, I like talking about Scots people. Scots people? What’s he talking about? Everybody knows the Scotsmen wear kilts, right? A little bit odd, but they do. They wear dresses before it was cool. Now what’s a kilt, we spell it KLT because those are the three processes that everybody needs to understand how you interact with other people. K stands for to know, L stands for to like, and then T stands to trust. Unless and until you get to know somebody, like them, and trust them, there’s never going to be the possibility of doing something as precious as creating a sales relationship because all build relationships.
So on your personal profile, especially LinkedIn because that’s a business place but even if it’s on Instagram or on Facebook or any other place you want, even on Tiktok. Do not think for a moment that what you put on LinkedIn is different than Tiktok. You know, don’t be painting yourself white and blue on Tiktok and say, “Oh, yes. Well, I’m a good salesperson on LinkedIn.” Be yourself to the fullest extent possible and emphasize everything that you do, revolving around the word “Giving.”
The world has shifted, there is a shift going on. Most people, by the way, Brynne and Bill can’t pronounce the “F” in the shift they use the other thing, but shift has happened. And the shift that has happened is the following.
The ability to put forth your best self, honestly, because it will all come out very soon if it’s not, but put your best filter. Everybody has something positive, purposeful, powerful, and pleasant about yourself. So you don’t have to go crazy. Just be you to the fullest extent knowing that you want to be a giver. When you’re a giver instead of a getter, then you’re going to be able to come across very nicely on your profile.
Brynne Tillman 05:26
I love it. You talk a lot about kind of the joy around living around success, how being happy helps you be more successful, and faster. Share a little bit about that.
Barry Shore 05:38
So imagine the following standing up in the morning, hale and hearty, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound and that evening, be in the hospital, totally, completely paralyzed. That was me. And it was not an automobile accident, it was not a spinal injury, a rare disease I never heard of the day before, took over my body and rendered me a quadriplegic. Look that word up if you don’t know it, quadriplegic.
144 days in the hospital, two years in a hospital bed in my own home, I couldn’t turn over by myself. I was four years in a wheelchair, with braces on both my legs, my hips, and my ankles, that was progress. Thank God today, Brynne and Bill, I’m able to be vertical and ambulatory with help of a seven-foot walking one. I still cannot walk up the stairs by myself. I can’t walk up a curve by myself.
Now I’ve helped 12 hours a day, seven days a week. But you hear my voice, positive, purposeful, powerful, and pleasant. It’s all because of one word, one word. And it is SMILE. Smile? Yes, SMILE is a great acronym that stands for “Seeing Miracles In Life Everyday.” And the greatest miracle of life is to live in JOY daily, no matter the circumstance. I just gave you some circumstances. Now, by the way, JOY is an amazing acronym that stands for “Journey Of You.”
See this show, interesting enough, is not about Brynne, not about Bill, great people, not about Barry Shore, it’s about you. You who are listening who are watching, because you’re here not for information, that is readily available anywhere, you’re here for transformation. The ability to find those nuggets and internalize them, utilize them, and leverage them in your life and do it and become happier, healthier. You will be wealthier, I guarantee it or your money back.
Brynne Tillman 07:20
So I just need to go deeper on this because I mean, like I have chills, right. Like, to me what you are saying is what we all strive, which is, you know, a happy, healthy, successful life. Right? That’s, that’s what we all, but, happy is always first, right? Like, if you said to me, you could have one wish it would be to be happy because it means all the other things are falling into place. But when you were faced with some of these, you know what some people would have given up on, would have gotten depressed, would have given up on life. You had joy and talk to us a little bit about how you shifted with the “F.” How you shifted from the “I’m a victim” to “I love my life.”
Barry Shore 08:10
Let’s go and do use what Brynne just said because I like to two V words, to go from victim to victor, is it easy? Hello? Is it work? Yes. And guess what, the good idea is that it’s work. So you work on something and you find a result from the work, then you can celebrate.
So I am blessed to have been in the sales process since I’m 12 years old, more than 60 years. And part of that is I learned many, many years ago, the six most important words in the English language, these six words, if you can use them inside of you and use them for your mind and repeat them and work with them til they become your habit, then you will see the shift and these six words are, “Choice, not chance, determines your destiny.” Choice, not chance, determines your destiny. Okay, did something happen? Yes. Well, how do I choose to respond to that? That’s up to me. I choose to respond in joy.
Now, does that mean I walk around and say, “Yeah, look at me I’m quad. I can’t move up. Yeepee!” Hello, that’s an idiot! But do I choose to make sure that what I have still has nothing to do with my body? Does my mouth still work? Does my mind still work? Well, my wife would argue but the point is, can I still be a benefit to the world because that’s the essence of sales by the way. You talked before about social sales. Well, I believe and know for a fact that the highest calling in life is to be a salesperson.
Now some people will think, what are you talking about? Doctor, lawyer, Indian chief? They all do sales. Because nothing happens to the world until one person sells something to somebody else. And there’s a mutual benefit. I call it T and T Brynne and Bill, your B&B. I call it T&T. Sales are both transactional and transformational. Transactional in the sense that yes, okay, there’s money exchanged and things like that there’s a service or product that is purchased, used, it’s a benefit. It’s transformational. Because unless you’re out there hustling, or you’re selling the, you know, not evil things, which some people do, it’s there. It’s transformational for the person who’s making the sale, for the person who received, for the company, all of those things, that’s transformational.
You’re in the world to be a benefit, I call Bab, and you’re there to make sure that you become top of mind, Tom, now you’re in a process that literally transforms the whole process, and it’s a high calling. People should know, being in sales is not just what do you do? If somebody, I work a lot with people who sell insurance, that’s what they think they do. Hello, anybody who says I sell insurance doesn’t know what they’re talking about. If you tell me I offer people family planning, financial planning, the ability to make sure that there’s an estate and things, okay, I talk to people in the mortgage business I trained thousands of people to walk into I say, ask them, “What do you do?” “Oh, in the mortgage…” but no, no, “I’m in the happiness business” What? I get people to get in their hearts. Does that make anybody happy getting a house or refinance?
Hello, it’s the ability to understand that you are living in this world that we call transformation. And when you do that, you get up in the morning, say, “Oh, I get the ability to be involved with this. This is wonderful.” And I’d like to share some techniques if you let me, you know, a few minutes remaining.
Brynne Tillman 11:54
Yeah, I would. I want to just comment on one thing real quick that I love. Many eons ago, I read a book by, I believe it was David Viscott that talked about contemplative freedom, right? And that was the freedom between the time that something happens to you and the time that you react to it, that you have the freedom to contemplate how you wish to react. Is that familiar to you?
Barry Shore 12:23
It is, and I have to tell you, I’m tingling right now, Brynne and I know our time is so short, but on one of my I cards, by the way, I should give my URL just for people to know. (Brynne: So you can do it now and at the end.)
Okay, people, everybody should go to barryshore.com. Free gift by the way there, go get the free course, introductory course. Take the quiz, What color is your stress? but we distribute things called Keep Smiling cards around the world, we’ve given over two and a half million, over 27 languages. But one of the cards is titled, can you read that? (Brynne: Happy By Choice.) Happy by Choice, on the back there’s three quotes. One of the quotes is from David Viscott. (Brynne: Oh my gosh.)
He’s talking about determination. If you could get up the courage to begin, you have the courage to succeed. And Barry Shore is here to add an asterisk to that, a postscript and it is “You cannot fail.” I’m gonna say it again, Bill and Brynne, you cannot fail, use my course, read my books or find somebody else. But I literally have taught thousands of people to understand. If you work at the process, you cannot fail. (Brynne: Wow.)
One of the greatest tips that I’m going to share with everybody right now for salespeople. It is so important and this is where most I’d say 96.2% of all salespeople don’t do this correctly. And if they did, their sales would increase dramatically. You ready for it? (Brynne: Ready.) (Bill: Ready.) When you ask a closing question. You must shut up.
Bill McCormick 14:01
But wait, I have more to say.
Barry Shore 14:06
Bill just did it. The greatest difficulty that salespeople have is they think that I need to tell them something. Okay, we all know the two ears, one mouth, it’s more than that. It’s listening. It’s deep listening and it’s the ability to utilize and leverage silence for benefit. When the person you’re working with, not selling to working with, has to use the mind in their heart to evaluate what you’re saying. Then you are, and I use this, I teach this, you’re in control. That control is a powerful weapon. It has to be used gently. But you’re in control, the person asking the question is and control. When you ask that closing question. You shut up. The vast majority of salespeople can’t.
Brynne Tillman 14:59
That’s an interesting perspective and I think it’s a good one because we talk a lot about listening. Mostly social listening but listening in the sales call is absolutely vital. Tell me a little bit about how a salesperson can choose joy and show up. I mean, obviously, smile. I love that when you’re smiling, you’re showing up. But you know, when you’ve gone through, you know, you’re having a bad day and the verbal that you got canceled. You know, whatever it is, (Barry: Keep going, keep going.) Yeah, right but I mean, there’s a whole list of…(trails off)
Barry Shore 15:34
Okay, I want to just, I want to confront Brynne on something. There’s no such thing as a bad day. You hear me, everybody? No such things. There are potentially difficult moments in the day. There’s not a bad day, you can’t have it. If you’re alive, you can’t have a bad day. Moments. And when you begin to work through moments, then you can evaluate. Okay, yes. The verbal canceled. Wait a minute, that was a $28,000 commission, ahhh, stress! When was it going to happen? All of a sudden the world, I can’t. Take into perspective, are you alive? Can you walk? Can you talk? Do you have water to drink? Food to eat? Places to eat? Family, friends? Yes.
I’m going to share with you two things before we leave. I’m going to show you, I’m gonna tell everybody and hopefully come back again, we’ll do more in-depth. How you, as a salesperson, how you never have to work again. Want to know how to never have to work again? And again, this is not 96.2, this is 98.7% of all salespeople don’t know how to do this or do it well. Ready? Ask for and receive referrals.
Brynne Tillman 16:39
Yes, we agree. We could not agree more.
Barry Shore 16:42
Okay. Somebody just bought, they signed it, they paid, not a verbal. You got the check, the check cleared. So somebody, here’s a, this is not trained sales being. Says to Bill, “Bill, you know, somebody else that could use my service a product?” Well, that’s not asking for a referral. It’s called being dumb. Bill, do you have any particular hobbies that you really like? (Bill: I like to golf.)
Oh, are you on foursome? Or you’d have maybe a regular foursome, two or three of your foursome? Do you know, one of the people that would really benefit from what it is that we have to offer?
Bill McCormick 17:17
Everyone needs joy. (Barry: Okay, wow!)
Barry Shore 17:19
Because that’s, you know, that’s what, that is what I sell, by the way, that’s very cool. So this is very important, we just remember how we just did it, though, I gave him the ability to focus on three or four or five people rather than “Gee, you know, anybody could use this?”
Brynne Tillman 17:33
Can I throw in how we teach this? Or do you want to do it BIll? You, do it.
Bill McCormick 17:38
Yeah. So one of the great things about LinkedIn is when you can see who I can see who Brynne’s connected to and if Brynne’s connected to Barry, and Barry’s my ideal client and I’ve done work with Brynne, I can ask Brynne to make an introduction, or I can ask Brynne if I can use her name when I reach out to Barry. I’m watching, I did that this morning with five people. And I’ve gotten some connection requests already back. And now I’m going to have meetings with them because I’m coming in at a higher level of credibility. And that’s the magic of LinkedIn, as a referral site and as a networking site.
Barry Shore 18:14
By the way, I didn’t want to say that because they’re the LinkedIn specialists. I want them to use their expertise. Otherwise, it makes them look bad to “Barry knows that they don’t say” So, yes, there we are. (Brynne: Thanks for making us look good. We appreciate that.) That’s what good salespeople do. You make the other person look good because we’re good-looking people, always looking forward and finding the good.
Bill McCormick 18:39
So I want to kind of flip this around. I was on a mastermind of salespeople earlier today, we were talking about how salespeople, we get in our own heads. And one of the things that happen to us is something good happens, right? I signed that $28,000 commission deal and I’m happy for about 5.3 seconds and then I realized, “Oh my god, I have to do this again next month. Oh my god, I have to do this again next year.” So how do we stay in joy? And enjoy that moment?
Brynne Tillman 19:09
That’s a great question.
Barry Shore 19:11
Are you ready? It is the process of moving from obligation to opportunity. What you just said Bill was correct. Could be five three-point seconds, could be 5.3 minutes, could be five an hour, it doesn’t matter. I got to do it again? That’s obligation. (Bill: Mmm.)
Opportunity is “Oh, wow. I just dig this so much. Look at what I get to do! I get to go play golf. I get to drive. I get to talk to people, share my amazing product and service and it just proved that it works.” And she wants this or he wants this and I can apply this for them from obligation to opportunity.
When the mindset, you see everything begins here, your thoughts, your words, and your deeds. When they are aligned, we call that a spiritual chiropractor, again, this is my free introductory course. Free, (Bill: Free,) free, freeee… (Brynne: We love free!) (crosstalk)
Bill McCormick 20:13
And how much does that cost?
Barry Shore 20:14
Yeah, and double your money back. If you’re dissatisfied, it’s the ability to understand that joy literally animates and you move from there. So I’m going to share one more point. By the way, SHARE stands for spreading happiness and rejuvenating energy!
Brynne Tillman 20:32
I love your acronyms. (crosstalk)
Barry Shore 20:34
No matter what happens in any sales interaction, or any sales presentation, no matter what, I don’t care if you hear 30 nos in a row and I’ll teach you by the way how to use no, but we don’t have time today. But doesn’t matter what happens, you provide a written thank you note to whoever you interacted with and I say written, I don’t mean email even though email’s great. I don’t mean text even though text is great. You hear that? You can do both of those two as well.
Written, handwritten note to whoever you’re communicating with, and I’ve done this by the way with people in Japan. I used to do a lot of business in Japan. And when they got a letter or note from me in the United States, in Japan, I can tell you one story alone that netted me from a thank you note to a Japanese client, netted me you’re going to find this hard to fathom, $722,000 commission in the following 12 months.
Bill McCormick 21:36
Barry Shore 21:38
And I didn’t know! I did it because that’s how I was taught and I was taught by great people. Written note, thank you, no matter what, they say yes, written note. They say no, written note. You never know.
Bill McCormick 21:53
That’s great. So if you’re listening to this, you’re obviously smiling because this was such a good episode. We definitely will have you back, Barry. But let everyone know a little bit about again how they can connect with you and about the offer for your free course.
Barry Shore 22:10
The website barryshore.com. There you have to click on the free introductory course on how to live in joy daily no matter the circumstance and you know my circumstance. Also, you can take the free 90-second quiz of What Color is Your Stress? Matter of fact, when we come back next time, let’s emphasize and talk about stress because it does work in the social sales world doesn’t it?
Brynne Tillman 22:42
It lurks in all of the sales.
Barry Shore 22:45
Thank you and all of life.
Bill McCormick 22:47
And all of life. Yes, definitely!
Barry Shore 22:47
Everything that happens in your sales experience works in your whole life, with your family, your friends, and all living beings. But the most important being is you. We will have to, we want to learn how to use self-talk as the most important speech you’ll ever hear.
Bill McCormick 23:05
Fantastic! So, Barry Shore, the ambassador of joy, thank you so much for being on Making Sales Social. This was so, so good.
Barry Shore 23:12
Can we do two quick things? Can I leave with a big hug and a blessing? (Bill: Go ahead.) (Brynne: Yes!) I’m going to say, I’m going to HUG you in front of hundreds of thousands of people. I’m gonna tell you what HUG stands for, that’s a blessing. HUG stands for “Harmonizing, unlimited giving.” Harmonizing unlimited giving, 1,2,3,… (shouts) And our blessing for everybody is go forth, live exuberantly, spread the seeds of joy, happiness, peace, and (sings) love.
Bill McCormick 23:44
Amen. Thanks so much, Barry and thanks, everyone for watching. Be sure to be back here next time for another episode of Making Sales Social! And as you’re out and about this week, don’t forget to make yourself social, joyfully. We’ll see you next time. Bye-bye.
Bob Woods 24:02
Thanks for watching and join us again for more special guest instructors bringing you marketing sales, training, and social selling strategy that will set you apart. Hit the subscribe button below to get the latest episodes from the Making Sales Social podcast. Give this video a thumbs up and comment down below on what you want to hear from us next. You can also listen to us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Google Play. Visit our website socialsaleslink.com For more information.